Annerisms can commonly occur anywhere in the base of my brain. When the size of an Annerism increases in my mind, there is a significant risk of rupture, resulting in a post of sorts, or other complications but definitely not death. Annerisms are my take on life and the world at large, or the world at small, which would be what's taking place in my immediate environment. Note that none of my Annerisms are caused by disease.
Building the Tapestry Thought by Thought
This morning it is raining and overcast. My children and I had the lights out last night before eight o’clock. I can’t tell you how nice that felt. We each had over ten hours of sleep. Yep, sleep rocks! I don’t get enough of it. Arianna Huffington told me that I cannot catch up on sleep. Can you believe she actually called me to tell me that? She’s a Sleep Evangelist so why wouldn’t she?
I’m sipping my cup of joe, my daughter is reading the paper, and my pups are waiting for the skies to clear. We’ve got Carole King singing to us. I’m totally present in this moment.
“My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue An everlasting vision of the ever-changing view A wondrous, woven magic in bits of blue and gold A tapestry to feel and see, impossible to hold”
What resonates is that last stanza: “impossible to hold” - how true it is. I want to hold onto the beautiful moments, I try hard to keep them within reach. I write them down in detail. I even take pictures (as you well know). I do what I can to remember the good and let go of the bad. But really, what is the difference? They both - the good and the bad - move past me. And, is there really ever a “bad” or is that just my perception? If I believe that everything in the universe is happening for me then where exactly do I deposit this notion of bad?
This is one of the greatest benefits of my inquiry practice. My practice of questioning my thoughts has changed my relationship with almost everything. Well everything, actually. I now am not afraid of insects as a result of doing inquiry on my fears.
Before inquiry came into my life, I thought it was possible to think my way out of every discomfort, dilemma, or debacle. In retrospect, I wonder why I allowed my thoughts to carry such weight. Now I see thoughts as bubbles: insubstantial, arising from nowhere and vanishing into nowhere. They are mere scraps of language, random images and sounds.
Once we bring awareness to our thinking process, we can see where we are prone to fixation and obsession. Often our physical state has tremendous weight on how we see things. When I am tired, the tone of my thoughts are grumbly and depressing. When I am exercising, I am usually bright and cheery.
Deciding to learn more about your thought patterns is one of the best decisions you can make for your life. With enough practice, it will be easy to see where your thoughts sabotage or help you. I’m not an expert in this arena but I know one. I also practice every day. I take the advice of the Buddha in my practice. He recommended bringing “bare attention” to our thoughts, which is to say, bare judgment. By learning to look at my thoughts in a nonreactive, nonjudgmental manner I am learning to be more receptive and open to those in my immediate environment. And, that my friends, is always a win-win.
“Then the well spoke to me. It said: abundance is scooped from abundance yet abundance remains.” (Anne Sexton)
May today be a day of abundance - scooped and shared - for you, my friends!
This idea that we exist as individuals, solely unto ourselves, works until it doesn't work - when this idea butts up to reality. I love thinking of myself as a solo explorer even though most of my writing is to the contrary. I often prefer to be alone than in the company of others. I like to go on solo adventures - whether they are real or imagined.
I think I mentioned in the past that my writing is my journey, it is where I learn about myself and the world I live in. So, this afternoon as I was writing in my journal I saw that old myth of separation trying to substantiate itself again.
I have a feeling I am at odds with a dear friend, a colleague that I serve my country with. He asked me to do something. I did do what I was asked to. However, it was not done on his timeline. So, now I'm getting the cold shoulder. We all know what the cold shoulder feels like. I haven't felt it for so long that I was surprised at my own reaction. I really wanted to give him a piece of my …
I'm pretty happy with my family this morning. After attending a screening of the movie, Minimalism, I shared with them only a little of what the message in the movie meant to me. Everywhere I look, there are little piles of what they are ready to let go of, stuff they see as excess. I have to be honest, I haven't quite digested all of the movie's implications on my day-to-day life. It's not easy to look at all of one's possessions and realize that most of it isn't really needed. For example, I have a Hohner harmonica from my days at Cal when I aspired to sit on the steps of Zellerbach Hall and play one of Stevie's numbers to a cute girl passing by. I have not played nor touched it in over ten years. But as I went to place it in the "excess box" my hand would not release it. All the memories flooded me. So, I did the next best thing. I played some horrible sounding riff (not horrible, "poor acoustics," according to PB) to Nancy on the ph…