Annerisms

If you're not LGBTQ, Black, a Survivor of Gun Violence, Muslim, a High School Student, an Immigrant, a Woman, Poor, an Elder, or Human, you don't need to read this...keep scrolling... We are in a time where many groups of humans are facing the indignities of discrimination, oppression, unmitigated harassment and actual physical violence. Where do we turn to? Who do we turn to?  I've spoken to many people who don't think any of this is new. It's just that we can see it now. We live in an era of videos and sharable media. People who are reluctant to step in and help aren't afraid to video the violence and post it.  I met with a friend this morning for coffee. We spoke of how difficult it is to believe the world is existing as it is. How can we sustain this much longer? Hate isn't sustainable. I don't how many of us are aware of this fact. It's destructive and it isn't selective of who it destroys.  Our communities are undergoing systematic

This Mother's Day I honor my co-parent, best friend, all around cheerleader. Lisa is Mama to the two children who light up my life on a daily basis. It goes without saying, they are indeed the apples of her eye.  We don't honor enough. At least I don't. So here I am...honoring.  Lisa's contribution to these two amazing human beings who are growing up in a world that is confusing at times: She teaches them resiliency because she is resilient. She shows them how to be strong as she continues to show up every weekend for them even t hough she spends the weeks traveling the country. She teaches them to take responsibility, to never blame someone else for their faults, failings and mistakes. Every weekend she participates in a project with them, whether it is dying eggs from dye she and Bahe made, going over to a friend's house to help with her ever-growing garden, teaching them how to make a cake, helping Bahe weave his first mini rug, or painting something magnifi

When we think about the emergence of our true selves, we often think of a timeline of sorts. We make predictions about our own children yet we truly have no idea as to what sexual identities will emerge or when they will emerge. Our sexual identity is not pre-formatted in the way we might want to believe. We cannot cause a child to be female if he is born into a female body nor can we prevent a male from being female if she is born into a male body. Even a child has an internal, deeply-held sense of their gender. For transgender people, their gender identity does not match the sex they were assigned at birth. Most people have a gender identity of man or woman (or boy or girl). For some people, their gender identity does not fit neatly into one of those two choices, the non-binary. Unlike gender expression gender identity is not visible to others. I’m still learning about all of this. I hope you are, too. Our children are going to change everything we believe about everything. An

I've been been offline for only two days but it seems like at least a week... On Wednesday night, early Thursday morning is probably more accurate, I woke up unable to breathe. I immediately ran outside. I didn't even think about it, it was instinctive. My place was very warm and I knew the air outside was crisp and cold. I wasn't sure how long I was going to be able to exist without any air in my lungs. I took tiny sips of air, gasping, completely full of fear. The only thought in my mind was what would happen to my children. I laid my body on the quiet freezing ground and asked God not to let it be my time. I kept fighting to breathe, making weird gasping sounds as my body fought for oxygen. After about ten minutes, I felt like I could stand and it was going to be alright. At that moment my daughter appeared out of the darkness and asked what was wrong. I told her I couldn't breathe and she said, "Want me to breathe for you, Dada?"  We came back in the

I suppose since it is the new year and there are new beginnings (real as well as imagined) happening all around, it is not too far-fetched to sound the WAKE UP call. As I rolled my body out of bed, careful not to put pressure on my tailbone, I thought about where I wanted to go in twenty eighteen. I no longer do the resolution list because I loathe lists and my follow through is laughable. I do, however, create some intentions. Mostly, I just ask God daily for faith and wisdom to know what path to follow or when to create my own.  In reality, the only way to be a light and walk in the light is to walk with wisdom. This last year has been a poignant lesson on how timing is related to wisdom. Because of timing, I've let relationships go, knowing their time was over. I've also let habits go because I saw how they disrupted the timing of the harvest in my life. Essentially, this past year has been a lesson best expressed in the phrase: WAIT FOR IT!  I've accepted tha