Posts

The Myth of Separation

Image
This idea that we exist as individuals, solely unto ourselves, works until it doesn't work - when this idea butts up to reality. I love thinking of myself as a solo explorer even though most of my writing is to the contrary. I often prefer to be alone than in the company of others. I like to go on solo adventures - whether they are real or imagined. I think I mentioned in the past that my writing is my journey, it is where I learn about myself and the world I live in. So, this afternoon as I was writing in my journal I saw that old myth of separation trying to substantiate itself again. I have a feeling I am at odds with a dear friend, a colleague that I serve my country with. He asked me to do something. I did do what I was asked to. However, it was not done on his timeline. So, now I'm getting the cold shoulder. We all know what the cold shoulder feels like. I haven't felt it for so long that I was surprised at my own reaction. I really wanted to give him a piece of my …

Building the Tapestry Thought by Thought

Image
This morning it is raining and overcast. My children and I had the lights out last night before eight o’clock. I can’t tell you how nice that felt. We each had over ten hours of sleep. Yep, sleep rocks! I don’t get enough of it. Arianna Huffington told me that I cannot catch up on sleep. Can you believe she actually called me to tell me that? She’s a Sleep Evangelist so why wouldn’t she? I’m sipping my cup of joe, my daughter is reading the paper, and my pups are waiting for the skies to clear. We’ve got Carole King singing to us. I’m totally present in this moment.  “My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue
An everlasting vision of the ever-changing view
A wondrous, woven magic in bits of blue and gold
A tapestry to feel and see, impossible to hold”  What resonates is that last stanza: “impossible to hold” - how true it is. I want to hold onto the beautiful moments, I try hard to keep them within reach. I write them down in detail. I even take pictures (as you well know). I do…

KEEP WHAT'S WORTH KEEPING

Image
I'm pretty happy with my family this morning. After attending a screening of the movie, Minimalism, I shared with them only a little of what the message in the movie meant to me. Everywhere I look, there are little piles of what they are ready to let go of, stuff they see as excess. I have to be honest, I haven't quite digested all of the movie's implications on my day-to-day life. It's not easy to look at all of one's possessions and realize that most of it isn't really needed. For example, I have a Hohner harmonica from my days at Cal when I aspired to sit on the steps of Zellerbach Hall and play one of Stevie's numbers to a cute girl passing by. I have not played nor touched it in over ten years. But as I went to place it in the "excess box" my hand would not release it. All the memories flooded me. So, I did the next best thing. I played some horrible sounding riff (not horrible, "poor acoustics," according to PB) to Nancy on the ph…

LIFE HAPPENING IS WHAT HAPPENS

Image
Life is happening...This isn't sometimes, this is always. Life is always happening, whether we believe it or not. Every moment has a purpose, there is meaning in everything. Sometimes a thing means nothing and sometimes it means everything - then, there is the "in between" to be accounted for as well. I'm currently reading A.J. Jacobs book, Drop Dead Healthy. I've read his two previous books so I have an idea of his writing style. He continues to amuse and enlighten me. I'm not necessarily on a quest for perfect health but I am beginning to create a new path for physiological health. I've not been taking care of my temple very well. I may have overlooked it while focusing on my mental health, forgetting entirely that everything is interlinked. I am really interested in slowing down and digesting more of life in a moment-by-moment basis. It may sound weird but it's really where I'm at right now. I thought I was getting to the core of understanding…

ART IS EMBEDDED IN THE HEART

Image
Just like children, anyone who regularly engages in the work of art develops a life filled with wonder, yearning, flow, and serious play all over the place. For a long time, I thought this was childish but I know now that this is maturity. When I let my inner self free and stay in the moment, incredible art is created. When I can stay in this place of wonderment, these created pieces of art (which can take the form of friendships, work projects, health, new ideas, etc.) further conceptualize.  Maturity is not the sagacity to know the "right" answers or to appear unfazed by the ups and downs as much as it is the capacity to tolerate paradoxes and complexities, to grow within them. Such maturity provides the strength to hold onto long term goals throughout the jitterbug of ongoing process, to adhere to overarching themes even as we are engrossed in the details. Maturity allows us to hold conflicting values and ideas and at the same time, combine them in productive, innovative…

OARING IS NEVER BORING

Image
Let me just start off by suggesting that you stop taking life so seriously. Be aware that thoughts will change and shift just like the wind and the water when you're in a boat, thoughts are no different than anything else. Okay, so that's the premise I'm sailing on this morning. 
Are you ready?
This past weekend was one of the best weekends I've had in a long time. The reason for its high ranking is based primarily on simplicity. I didn't do anything extravagant. In fact, I was barred from extravagance because I pulled something in my lower back as well as contracting poison ivy when I was in Flagstaff. Both have limited my physical movement. I'm not one to share injuries because I view physical injuries as a type of weakness. (Don't read too much into that!) But I share it with you here because it is part of my lesson. I absolutely had to slow down. And when you're not at your best physically, something happens internally that allows your lens to wide…

PARENTING ISN'T BLACK AND WHITE

Image
Yeah, I said it. And, I mean it. Parenting isn't black and white, nor is it for the faint of heart. Nor does it come in a one size fits all.

For all you grammar aficionados that last sentence is incorrect and I know it. The word "nor" is a conjunction and is used before the second or further of two or more alternatives to indicate that they're each untrue. It's against the rules to use it as a standalone. But, I used it anyway, because it furthers my point about parenting which is: there are no precise rules to follow that will make you a parenting aficionado.

If you want to be a good parent, let go of the idea of being a good parent. I can't tell you how many books I've read on parenting. While they have given me some really good ideas and a hell of a lot to think about they haven't given me the golden key to parenting.

I'll be honest with you, I don't understand entirely who I am with my children. The most I know on any given day is that I …